Terror......Modern Style

What is terrifying to you? Getting in a car crash? Can't find your child? How about "Lost your DEBIT CARD!" For most of us, including me, our debit cards are our lifeline. Hubby and I rarely have cash with us anymore. We do everything by debit card. Groceries, restaurants, Wally-world. Until we lose it. Today I went to the grocery store, shopped and approached the checkout line. I spent a few moments perusing the trashy tabloids while waiting for the guy in front of me to buy $500 worth of groceries. (What does he have, a harem??) When he finally finished I stacked my groceries on the conveyor belt, moved my carriage down for the bag-boy (bag-man.....he was 80 if he was a day), and began to pull out my debit card while the cashier finished ringing up my order. It wasn't in the little pocket on the side of my purse where it belongs. Now, I'm not an anal person who has to have everything in it's place......but I usually stick it right in the front of the little pocket thing for easy access. So I don't have to dig for it. But it wasn't there, and thus I began the frantic purse-search.....I'm sure you're all familiar with it. Check all the inner pockets, un-zip the secret compartment (that never has anything in it), dig along the bottom, open all the outer pockets, check everything again....and again. Now I'm getting frantic because the cashier is almost done ringing my groceries. As I'm searching I'm muttering assurances that she probably can't hear...and doesn't care about. "I know it's here somewhere, I use it all the time." "I always keep it here in the pocket, I know I have it." In a desperate attempt for more time, I hand her a credit card I never EVER use.......she swipes it and informs me it has expired some time ago. DRAT! I ask about using a check - thank God my check book is in my purse - and she says I have to have a "check-cashing card". Can I get one? I have to go to the service desk, where they will take all my information and IF the bank approves it, they will give me a check-cashing card and let me pay for my groceries. The middle-aged cashier (at least she wasn't a snarky teenager) calls over her supervisor....who is at least 20 years younger than her and probably 30 years younger than me......who escorts me to the service desk. As if I'm going to take the carriage and run for the door with my $36.82 worth of groceries. At the service desk it took a surprisingly short time to get approved and I was out of the store 10 minutes later. Unfortunately, without the extra $10 I intended to ask for so I could get quarters to do my laundry. But I wasn't sticking around. We can wear dirty clothes for a week. Now the big question is....where is my debit card?? My head whirled on the ride home. I use ONE purse. Always. Summer and winter. No matter what outfit. Sometimes I take the card out and stick it in my jeans pocket if I don't want to carry my purse. But I'm wearing the only pair of jeans I own, and believe me....I've checked the pockets. I imagine someone must have stolen it. I have to call the bank when I get home. I have to call Hubby and tell him not to try to use his card, since they are both connected to the same account. Should I go directly to the bank on my way home? Would it be better to call?? This is going to be a giant pain in the buttocks. And then it hits me just as I'm pulling into my driveway. I went out with my boss last Wednesday night to a community event. I wanted to look nice. So for ONCE.....I brought a tiny little purse that I keep for times like that. And I had put a little cash and my debit card in it. Just in case. I dragged my grocery bags in, dumped them on the kitchen floor and headed straight to the bedroom to pull out the little purse. And there it was. Tucked in a pocket. My beautiful, beautiful bright red debit card. I wanted to kiss it.